Helping a Loved One Who Is Struggling With Substance Use

Watching someone you love struggle with drugs or alcohol is painful. You may feel scared, angry, exhausted or unsure what to say. Those feelings are normal. The good news is that family and friends can make a real difference in whether someone reaches out for help.

Here are some practical ways to support a loved one, from our team at Resolve Wellness in Columbus.

Learn a little first

Substance use disorder is a health condition, not a lack of willpower. Learning how it works, and what treatment looks like, can help you respond with patience instead of frustration. Our guide to levels of care is a good place to start.

Choose a calm moment to talk

Timing matters. Try to talk when your loved one is sober and you’re both calm, not in the middle of an argument or a crisis.

• Speak from your own experience: “I’ve been worried about you” rather than “You always…”
• Name specific things you’ve noticed, without labels like “addict.”
• Listen more than you talk.
• Expect that it may take more than one conversation.

Avoid shame and threats

Shame tends to push people away from help. Lecturing, yelling or ultimatums made in anger rarely work. Kindness doesn’t mean agreeing with everything. It means keeping the door open.

Set healthy boundaries

Supporting someone doesn’t mean protecting them from every consequence. It’s okay to decide what you will and won’t do. For example, you might choose not to give money, or not to allow substance use in your home. Clear, calm boundaries protect you and can encourage change.

Offer to help them take the first step

Reaching out can feel overwhelming. You can help by offering to sit with them while they call, or by requesting a call back together. Our team responds within 24 hours, and we accept Medicaid. A peer recovery supporter, someone with their own lived experience of recovery, can also make the first steps feel less lonely.

Be prepared for an emergency

If your loved one uses opioids, consider keeping naloxone (Narcan) at home and learning how to use it. If someone may be overdosing, or won’t wake up, call 911 right away. Use naloxone if you have it, and still call 911.

Take care of yourself, too

Loving someone with a substance use problem is hard. Make time for rest, keep up with your own health, and lean on people you trust. Support groups for families can help you feel less alone.

You don’t have to do this alone

If you’re worried about someone, call or text Resolve Wellness at 614-321-7734 to talk through options. You can also call the free, confidential SAMHSA National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357, any time.

If you or your loved one is in crisis, call or text 988. In an emergency, call 911.

This article is for general education and isn’t a substitute for personal medical advice. If you are in crisis, call or text 988. In an emergency or possible overdose, call 911.